Long Update

So I'm finally almost 100% better which means I can blog away to my heart's content. I have a super busy week to update everyone on.
Last Friday and Saturday was the peace symposium in Gulu. That's an event for 120 youth. We had a stakeholders meeting where four other ngo's came to hear about the project and talk with the youth. We had a day full of football matches (co-ed and all 20 members a side) and music, dance and drama competitions. I have to say I probably will try to avoid organizing similar events in the future as that was a lot of stress and to add to it I was getting sick. It was series of near disasters that somehow got worked out. I think the event went really well, the team that won the football cup was estactic and then their subcounty made a big deal out of it and they toured the cup around the camp etc but I have never been so tired and stressed before.
Saturday night was awful - I woke up with the worst case of fever induced chills I've ever experienced so I knew I had to go to the clinic but the next morning I was moving back to kamapala and taking the 12 youth reps down for the advocacy trip to kampala. That was not a pleasant bus ride, I spent most of the time trying not to sleep on Smart's shoulder (one of the youth - yes his name is Cangura David Smart - we also had Okot Jolly Joe on the trip, Akello Easter Monday stayed behind) . Arrived in kampala and waited around until someone had a car to take me to the clinic. Three hours later it turns out I had malaria (again!! and for real this time) and a severe infection (strep throat) SWEET!!! Bought out most of the drug store and went to bed. Got up to eat dinner at the solidarity dinner that had been organized for the youth with religious leaders unfortunately none of them managed to show. I ended up missing out the next two days of the advocacy trip which may have been a blessing in disguise as the team in kampala (one staff member and this other youth group) who were organizing the event appear to be the worst organizers ever! Besides being close to 120% over budget, there was no budget for meals for the youth, they lost two people for an afternoon, they didn't invite the donor to the cocktail party or to any part of it and guests of honour didn't show up constantly (i had to haul my butt out of bed and fix these problems when i could). If i had been with the group the whole time I may have had a total freak out even worse than I did. I'm pretty sure that team does not like me at all after i switched into butt kicking mode to ensure things got done, but if they had consulted the project officer (me) in charge of the project from the start a number of these problems would not have been issues. I did manage to make it to the last day which was a "mystery tour" (credit to K. Butler) to Entebbe where we went to the airport and the beach, a time shopping in town and then a cocktail party with the Minister for Youth and the Canadian Consulate (managed to fix that one at least). After the cocktail, some of the youth got to come back to the office and have a Canadian dinner (spaghetti and meat sauce) which was much appreciated.
All in all though I think the youth had a good time especially the ones who had never been to kampala before and so it was worth it but man was it unpleasant for me besides the double illness which was absolutely awful. I don't recommend that week to anyone and I now understand why people say malaria is so brutal - this wasn't few malarias this time, this was feel awful, walking up the flight of stairs in the main house tires you out, sweat for no reason then be freezing cold, lie on the couch in the office because you don't want to walk the less than fifty metres to your bed malaria. Thankfully I did everything right, got medical treatment as soon as i could, slept a ton, drank lots of fluids and well having a doctor in the office doesn't hurt either so it wasn't dangerous just unpleasant. I guess it's the price I pay for living next to a swamp or wetland in northern uganda, not getting proper rest for three months and having the kind of blood mosquitos just love despite repellent. Since Thursday when i put the youth on the bus and finished my medication (dont' know which one helped more) I've been much better (I didn't have a nap at all yesterday and I probably won't have one today) and today I've felt almost normal and went to the market to do some clothes shopping - bought a cute strapless white dress for like 7 dollars. It's funny I've been living up country for so long it was a bit of a shock to be out shopping in the market on saturday in kampala, so crowded and busy everywhere.

Sneaky blogging

So the peace symposium went pretty well, despite the fact I was overtired, stress and as I now know getting sick. I think the trip to Kampala has been going well but I've been unable to participate in most of it as I've been sick. I'm feeling a bit better now hence the blogging but have been banned from work since sunday afternoon and despite me being bored that was probably a good thing. Have spent my days napping, drinking juice and bumming around the office being told 'don't work'. Had to sneak on to the computer to check emails etc. Currently found someone's computer on and them out of the office so doing some sneaky computer usage....
Did manage get out last night and see the team for a bit at their hotel, they had a good press conference and day in general but only one of the MPs showed up for the meeting with parliamentarians. I think Kampala is a bit of a shock for most especially those from the more remote camps.
I'll write something long and detailed later on about the past week or so but at the moment I should get off the computer to avoid being told to stop working!!!

Update

I'M TIRED!!!

The week hasn't even really got started as the youth start arriving tomorrow for the peace symposium, yet already I'm exhausted.

Update on Collins - the YCFP has selected him to be one of their new members so at least I can organize a training for him next week. Isn't quite what he was hoping for but it's something.
I was seriously hoping they were going to include him in this training and they did.

Pre-apologies

So I probably won't be writing much in the next week or two so I apologize and explain now. Once I am able to post again I will write a ton and put up photos etc. But for the anticipated blog slacking - I'm sorry!
Explanation
This week I have a visit from DFAIT tomorrow afternoon, a whole day with the founder of Guluwalk on Wednesday, a review meeting on thursday afternoon and on thursday evening 100 youth from across the north are coming to town and i think i'm making some pasta for them all, friday is the peace symposium for those 100 youth plus 20 in the town which includes a stakeholders meeting that will involve district officials, people from other ngos etc etc, a football, netball tournament, relay races, art and speaking compeitions and other events then saturday the peace symposium continues, sunday i'm taking 12 youth to kampala for a five day advocacy trip (3 of whom have never been to k'la) which will include a informal dinner with all of the national religious leaders (except the mufti is now out on bail for fraud so dont' know about that one), a press conference, a meeting with parliamentarians, two presentations at schools, one at makerere university, a mystery tour day (trip to entebbe), a fancy cocktail and meanwhile i'll have a training going on back here in gulu which i obviously wont' have control over. Add to all that I've decided to move back to k'la to write my report and all b/c life is so much easier there and well I'd just rather live in Kampala that so when i take these youth down I'm moving too. I haven't even begun to pack up my room though started to give clothes away already, yes Laura that pink zippy is gone already!!!! Many others will be staying here as well because I can afford to buy more (though i am coming home to be unemployed - but partially b/c 10 months of hand washing and line dry is not good for clothes)while most people in the camps can't exactly pick up a bunch of cheap shirts from H and M in london on their way home....
I am rather torn about this whole moving back to kampala thing b/c i do love life up in Gulu, it's just a lot harder than life in kampala and a bit lonelier....

Crushing and Uplifting

So this morning I talked to Collins about not having anything for him to do. I think the conversation was harder on me than on him. Was talking to my dad on line afterwards, his comment was "I guess they get used to disappointment.which is so sad."



This afternoon, Evaline from Lalogi showed up for the workshop which starts tomorrow morning to prepare the team going on the advocacy trip to Kampala, not knowing why she was there. So I was explaining that we were doing this workshop to prepare people for the trip to Kampala when i realized she didn't know we had selected her (there were about 60 youth who wanted to go and we could only pick 12 and she was one of them). Turns out she has never been to Kampala before and now she is going as a spokesperson for her peers to be treated like a minor celebrity, carryout a press conference, have speaking engagements, meet with parliamentarians and religious leaders and be a tourist! The look on her face was priceless.
Pretty much it made the pain of working with this annoying youth network in Kampala to make the trip happen all worth it

Photos

Youth organized a friendly match between two divisions of the municipality as a peacebuilding activity

The girls were a little less friendly in their netball match

Each team got a goat (for eating) after the match.

And finally since things have been a little depressing in the blog recently so how about a photo of me in a katange (a modern style local dress)? I think I look HAWT!!!

What does get me

So as stated below I don't cry but that doesn't stop things from bothering me. Today one of the youth from the community who works with the Youth Coalition for Peace here dropped by with a letter for me. In a nutshell, the letter said that he finished O level (ordinary level of secondary school), tried to do driving school but couldn't finish b/c of financial problems, (mom died and dad married someone else and left him behind) and is unemployed and bored, so he asked if CPAR and I had any thing to keep him busy. Now Collins is the same age as I am and a good guy, friendly and talkative - someone who at home might not have the education level to get an amazing job but would still be very employable, eg. TBG would probably love him. Here he's just one of thousands. There are tons of people my age, older and younger with so much potential but there's nothing for them to do. It's killing me I can't help him out, there's no work here. I didn't know what to say so he's coming back to tomorrow which means I have to figure out how to tell him we can't even offer him something to occupy his time let alone provide a paycheck. Sometimes I feel like what I do really does make an impact and then other times I am so helpless it is soul crushing.

Voices of the Youth

On the Impact of the Conflict

“The Northern conflict itself …has become unhealing wounds causing death and injuries days and nights” Owino Geoffrey, Paicho Sub County

“Even our younger brothers and sisters, if this northern conflict does not end, will not grow up to be a capable generation in the future of Uganda’s government because even education is not effective to them, they are being abducted, their rights were abused, they were left orphans” Akumu Suzan, Bungatira Sub County

“Before the beginning of the war in Northern Uganda, people …. use to live happily in their home and villages. They have cattle, grew crops in their gardens and they moved freely from their villages to the trading centres … as a way of life which is base on a very strong value system.” Oprio Jacob, Anaka Sub County

“As a result of the northern conflict, many people have been gazzetted into a camp system of which it has become very difficult to efficiently follow the culture” Ongaba Bernard, Anaka Sub County

On Peace

“Now all the community in the region is opting for peaceful resolution for this Northern war/conflict” Topaco Richard, Amuru Sub County

“So we the youth of Northern Uganda are trying to stand up firmly and struggle for peace as we are also citizens of Uganda and we have right for peace” Akumu Suzan, Bungatira Sub County

“All youth should awake on struggling for peace building within their area, and they should forget on issues that might interfere with peace making” Opoka Robert, Anaka Sub County

“Northern Uganda is currently trying to be united since there was tribal differences and due to search for peace as we youth strand firm to preach peace throughout Uganda and globally” Akello Monica Latrifah, Bungatira Sub County

“We are not looking at the root of the conflict but we are just looking [at] the stem of the conflict that is why the ending of the conflict is difficult…” Akello Jennifer, Anaka Sub County

“Youth and children below 21 years do not know peace. We are born in war… despite all of this we the youth support peaceful means of bringing peace to Northern Uganda. We need equal peace to other parts of Uganda, we need to go back home. Please we need peace and want to see peace that people talk of.” Akera Judith, Amuru Sub County

“I will also request them to involve youth in the peace building process since youth are the role model for peace in the community and their voice should be presented…” Amito Beatrice, Anaka Sub County

“Peace in Northern Uganda can be got through dialogue” Obita Leodjellic, Amuru Sub County

Some “may feel we aren’t useful and promoting peace in our community as their minds is only about peace in Juba” Aciro Adelaide Opsa, Gulu Municipality

“It is also very important to appreciate and understand that the indigenous knowledge system and our own ways of building peace are very appropriate, essential and vital.” Kinyera Christopher, Bungatira Sub County

“However a bit of peace has emerged. There is still fear that talks may not bear good fruits so may I kindly request you … to work hard so that we continue attaining peace.” Okello Stephen, Lalogi Sub County

On the Future

“Transform our community through sharing and working together to build and sustain peace in Northern Uganda.” Otara John, Amuru Sub County

“If peace comes back to Acholiland, the level of our education will improve, we shall be able to fight poverty through farming as we shall go back to our ancestral land … our lost culture will also be gained and we shall be able to practice them.” Akello Evaline, Lalogi Sub County

“Returnees should be given amnesty because it wasn’t their will of going to the bush.” Bongomin Charles, Gulu Muncipality

“The whole world should stand up for the 20 years Northern Uganda has experienced war so that the problem of abducting children is prevented” Olanya Steward, Lalogi Sub County

“I and other youth of N.Uganda swear and have hope that instead of having war, we are going to perceive peace, love and unity among the people of N.Uganda.” Ochaka Geoffrey, Anaka Sub County

“I wish peace could resume back in Northern Uganda” Apuyu Vincent Wokorach, Lalogi Sub County

I had to type up these quotes from their essays on what they would tell parliament about peace and conflict in Northern Uganda for an advocacy information package. I asked if they (ok two representatives who happened to be in the resource centre) if it was ok to circulate this and they said fine so here it is.

I don't cry

So I was out for a soda (yes a soda) with Adam, who I met through Chris and Chelsea, the other night. We were talking about medical clinics and all that and I mentioned one experience I had taking one of the youth from Paicho to the clinic to get her very sick baby treatment during the training a couple of weeks ago because it was the first and only time me or anyone I know has not had to wait at all (we caught the doctor as he was leaving and asked him to go back in). The little boy was one sick kiddie, turned out he had malaria, a chest infection and was a bit malnourished. The doctor pretty much scolded/yelled at Alice for having a malnourished baby (which of course implies you’re a bad mother) in front of myself and Alfred the driver. She didn’t say anything but I could tell it was absolutely humiliating for her. Under the circumstances, living in a camp, dependent on WFP food, young poor unemployed mother etc. no matter how hard she tried it’s very difficult to ensure the baby is properly nourished. WFP does not exactly give a balanced diet; it’ll keep you alive and pretty much healthy but definitely does not meet the Canada Food Guide. When I finished talking, Adam just looks at me and says “wow, do you just go home and cry some nights?”
The thing is I don’t. I have seen and heard some absolutely horrendous things, things that I don’t put in here because I don’t want to talk about it and honestly it would upset too many people, yet I can only think of two instances where it made me cry or almost cry. Yeah I get frustrated and angry with the injustice of it all, but I don’t cry. This is strange because I’m not ashamed to admit it but before I left home episodes of Oprah occasionally made me cry. Now when faced with suffering beyond anything I had previously imagined I don’t even tear up. I don’t know if I’m coping very well, or if I’m just very good at compartmentalizing my life, or if I actually don’t have a heart, or if I’m just repressing everything so one day I’ll just start crying and not stop for weeks or something. I really hope it’s I’m just coping very well.

Tomorrow is International Women's Day! It's a public holiday here! Sweet!

Gas mask the new fashion accessory?

So life may be beautiful in Kampala but that doesn't stop the tear gas. Yep that's right, on monday most of the downtown core was awash in tear gas. The deal is the judiciary is on strike over their loss of independence stemming from the seige of the court so that some treason suspects who were being released on bail could be re-arrested. The whole thing is sketchy but you can check out the two Ugandan papers on line for details at www.newvision.co.ug for the gov't version and www.monitor.co.ug for the opposition version. It was the closest to a riot that has happened since I arrived.
Then this morning I came back up country to find that the police has broken out the tear gas against the students at Gulu University while they were protesting some financial issues that have arisen between the University, the Revenue agency and the gov't. This is not cool - I don't want to have to carry water around to protect myself from tear gas.
In other news there appears to be a renewed military presence in town. I haven't seen this many soldiers and miliatary vehicles in months......
So coupled with my discussion with the guy from the British High Commission about the kidnapping of British citizens/diplomats in Ethopia near the Eritrean border at Nicole's bday dinner, means I have been reminded that despite everything there are still some major problems over here.

life is beautiful in K'la

So been in Kampala since Saturday and got to work from the Kampala office today which was absolutely wonderful. I really needed the break after spending five days straight in the field. Though Friday's day in the field was enjoyable because we were showing Dwight from Toronto office and his wife Sue our projects and stuff. Sue and I got to go fabric shopping in Amuru at the shop of one of our landmine survivors who recieved a loan and then we wandered around the market for a bit and talked to children. My luo is getting much better, I can almost have a full conversation! Ok it's still like a hi how are you? i'm fine where are you going type conversation but I'm impressed. Dropped off the visitors at Paara lodge in murchison falls nat'l park so I got my one safari as we drove through the park - saw some buffalo, antelope-y things, porcupine and tons of birds and things. Got back to Gulu at 1120 at night.
Saturday morning I was supposed to take the post bus down to Kampala for the weekend and get to Kristy's in time for an afternoon drink and bbq. Youth meeting that I wasn't informed about until Thursday meant I couldn't leave at 8am and had to wait til almost one to leave.... so much for a relaxing afternoon in K'la. But when i got out to the house in naguru and finally escaped from the bathroom (door sticky and got stuck for a while after my shower), headed next door to Mark's house which is like Canada nice to catch the end of the BBQ. Spent the night sitting on the balcony overlooking the city eating newly imported italian chocolate (Mark works for WFP and their headquarters is in Rome), sipping a lemon cocktail and noting how good life is in Kampala. It's only now that I've been back that I realize how much better my life was here rather than in Gulu. That's not to say I don't enjoy the people I work with and all that in Gulu but still........
Sunday involved grocery shopping, going to a movie (Apoctolypto - not recommended at all!!!) and watching episodes of prison break. Today was a meeting at the office and then some procurement (aka shopping for books for the resource centre) now I'm off to Nicole's bday dinner at the new Turkish restaurant. Man life is good in Kampala.
Gulu tomorrow and then it's back to the grind stone hard core not that i didn't work hard today but anyways.
The end of my contract is approaching and I can't believe the amount of work still to be done.

The truce expired today.

So who knows what's going to happen but hopefully things will stay the same.

Job is seriously wearing on me, the mere thought of the three reports I have yet to write about activities in February makes me want to go home. I think I'm going to go watch a cheesy movie or something